December 20, 2014
Around the big top

I don’t want to go on a rant here…

By Tim Barnum|Staff writer
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Posted 6/24/09

It’s been awhile since I wrote a column about everybody’s favorite topic, politics!

Well don’t worry my little friends, I am here to alleviate your longings to hear my candor and wisdom.

First of all, let’s talk about this healthcare debate (hahaha I said healthcare debate, even though there has been no debate, since politicians don’t debate anymore they just say yes or no then go on TV to scream and yell about why they are right and everyone else is wrong).

The magic words in the healthcare issue are “public option.”

The magicest word being option.

Oh conspiracy theorists, your musings amuse me (nice play on words, eh?). Some say the president’s plan for a public option is bad. Why? Because it’s government control!

Of course there is the word option. OPTION! To me, this is a no-brainer. If I could have a cheap government healthcare plan, I would take that option. And guess what, I still have the option to drop that plan too! If I am being round up into a holding pen to wait for hours to see a Doctor who’s wants to drill a hole in my dome to release an evil headache demon, than I would drop the public option. And hopefully, when I drop the public option because the doctor made me a splint out of a snorkel, tin foil and an avocado (irrelevant reference to the movie Half Baked), my private plan would cost less due to the increase in competition provided by the public option.

OPTION! WHAT ARE PEOPLE NOT GETTING ABOUT THIS? AAAAHHH!

Is anyone else uneasy about the media being expelled from Iran? What is the “reelected” President of the Islamic Republic of Iran up to?

I have a bad feeling about the media being kicked out, especially with an insane anti-progressive leader who “won” this year’s election. Let’s hope those who have died trying to protest aren’t joined in masses, but honestly, to me it seems like that’s the reason the lunatic is doing this.

Thank God for Twitter, Facebook, etc. They are keeping us up on what is really going on in Iran.

By the way, (chant it with me) NEDA! NEDA! NEDA! NEDA!

Go protestors!

Next, my rant is turning towards the content I have absorbed from a book I am reading named Censored 2007, which covers the most censored stories in that year.

Admittedly, I read most of the stories with a grain of salt and some of them seem to be on the conspiracy theorist side (even though they have sources and documentation). But there is a section in the book called Junk Food News, which talks about topics that get heavy rotation in the news cycle, but really serve little purpose when it comes to educating/protecting/affecting the general public. The book argues that censored stories could easily replace the Brangelina crap in the news cycle.

Coincidentally, HBO personality Bill Maher has recently been getting recognition for bashing Obama for being on TV too much.

Maher is very, very left, but says he wishes Obama would be more Like George W. Bush. Meaning he wants the President to stop trying to be liked so much and push his agenda through.

What does this have to do with Junk Food News? News channels are feeding us Obama White House Junk Food.

Michelle’s garden, Bo the dog, Obama the basketballer and fly smasher (PETA, seriously, it’s fly), what’s the White House chef cooking for a special guest, Obama and VP Biden eating burgers, what are Michelle, Sasha and Malia wearing to this or that, shirtless Barack, Clooney visits the White House, so on and so on and so on.

Seriously, leave the GQ and Home and Gardening stories to those publications. I don’t want to turn on CNN and hear about Barack and Joe shoving greasy food down their throats when Iran is on the brink of a revolution. I don’t want Katie Couric to do an in depth special on Bo’s favorite dog food when domestic terrorists are killing people in Arkansas (an Army Private shot by a domestic terrorist who is a radical Islamic), Kansas (an abortion doctor killed by a domestic terrorist who said more events like that one are planned) and Washington D.C. (a racist, anti-Semite kills a security guard at the Holocaust Museum, and is shot, but still living, too seriously hurt to appear in court, but being kept alive nonetheless, probably with taxpayer money, plus he’s 88 years old).

Now these events were covered, but ask the average Joe who James Von Brunn (museum shooter) is, they’ll probably say “Uhhhhhhh.”

Ask them who Bo Obama is, they’ll tell you the breed, color, and dog food of choice for the first dog.

Now that’s a rant.

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